User:0xea

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A year of my work as a contributor and moderator have been anonymized for calling out the abuse of power and transphobia coming from 3 moderators.

Xea

Hyia!, Im Xea, auti transgirl, born early 2000s in Berlin.

Feel free to chat me up <3, just don't be a meanie.

Special Interests

  • chemistry and pharmacology
  • low level programming and reverse engineering

Mental Issues

  • (hypo-)manic episodes
  • autism
    • severe sensory issues
    • attention deficit disorder
  • long term dissociation
  • self-harm tendencies
Molly (Source for all notes below, Xea doesn't enduldge)

Complications

Why am I not dead yet?

Do I want to die?, Do I want to life?

Experiences

Substance Matrix

Salbutamol.svg
2C-B.svg
Amphetamine.svg
Dextroamphetamine.svg
Dextromethamphetamine.svg
3-FEA.svg
4-FMA.svg
Pseudoephedrine.svg
MDMA.svg
Lisdexamfetamine.svg
2-MMC.svg
3-MMC.svg
3-FMC.svg
Bupropion.svg
Mephedrone.svg
4-Methylbuphedrone.svg
4-Methylpentedrone.svg
N-ethyl-nor-pentedrone.svg
N-ethyl-nor-heptedrone.svg
MDPHiP.svg
Methylphenidate.svg
Ethylphenidate.svg
Cocaine.svg
N-Acetyl-L-Tyrosine.svg
Ibuprofen.svg
Acetylsalicylic acid.svg
Paracetamol.svg
Amisulpride.svg
DMT.svg
Melatonin.svg
5-HTP.svg
Diphenhydramine.svg
Modafinil.svg
Cetirizine.svg
Fluoxetine.svg
Loperamide.svg
Estradiol.svg
Estradiol valerate.svg
Estradiol cypionate.svg
Estradiol enantate.svg
Estradiol undecylate.svg
Finasteride.svg
Dutasteride.svg
CPA.svg
Beclometasone dipropionate.svg
Bromazepam.svg
Diazepam.svg
Lorazepam.svg
Alprazolam.svg
Mitragynine.svg
DXM.svg
Oxycodone.svg
6-MAM.svg
Diamorphine.svg
Promethazine.svg
Mirtazapine.svg
Quetiapine.svg
Noopept.svg
Nicotine.svg
Minoxidil.svg
DCK.svg
Ketamine.svg
3-Methylrolicyclidine.svg
Sertraline.svg
Aripiprazole.svg
Domperidone.svg
Bilastine.svg
Zolpidem.svg
CBD.svg
THC.svg
Pregabalin.svg
L-Theanine.svg
N-Acetylcysteine.svg
Caffeine.svg
Temgicoluril.svg
Pyridoxine.svg
Phenol.svg
Isopropanol.svg
Ethanol.svg

Route of Administration Ranklist

  • Intravenous
    • Cephalic
    • Median cubital
    • Femoral
    • Dorsal metacarpal
    • Small saphenous
    • Dorsal venous arch
    • Great saphenous
  • Inhaled
    • Metered-dose Inhaler
    • Volatile Fumes
  • Intrarectal
    • Injection
    • Suppository
  • Subcutanous
  • Intramuscular
    • Deltoid
    • Vastus lateralis
    • Vastus intermedius
  • Transdermal
    • Patch
    • Gel
  • Oral
    • Capsule
    • Solution
    • Tablet
    • Powder
  • Vaporized
    • Vaporizer
    • Oil pipe
    • Foily
    • Combusted
  • Intranasal
    • Powder
    • Spray

Substance Ranklist

adoration ❤ hatred

Hormone Medication

Compound Structure Notes
Estradiol Undecylate ❤ Estradiol undecylate.svg prodrug ester of life saving hormone; produces stable levels with no crashes when injected monthly
Estradiol Enantate Estradiol enantate.svg prodrug ester of life saving hormone; minor crashes when injected weekly; discomfort when injected every 4 days
Estradiol Cypionate Estradiol cypionate.svg prodrug ester of life saving hormone; crashes when injected weekly
Estradiol Valerate Estradiol valerate.svg prodrug ester of life saving hormone; crashes when injected weekly
Estradiol ❤ Estradiol.svg life saving hormone; caused figure changes, breast growth, body hair reduction, skin smoothing and minor emotional enhancements
Dutasteride ❤ Dutasteride.svg significantly reduced hairloss; no side effects; very long halflife
Cyproterone acetate CPA.svg helpful when estradiol levels drop below monotherapy levels; no side effects noticed so far
Beclometasone dipropionate Beclometasone dipropionate.svg might slightly have helped respiratory issues
Melatonin Melatonin.svg barely effective sleeping aid; potencially improves quality of sleep
Finasteride Finasteride.svg coincided significant suicidal thoughts; very short halflife; stopped treatment after a month

Entactogens

Compound Structure Notes
Methylenedioxymethamphetamine ❤ MDMA.svg my favorite psychoactive substance; helped fix several friendships; allowed me to reprocess some traumatic events; will turn anybody into a cuddle-machine; do not intravenously inject, will drain serotonin immediately, gave me serotonin syndrome
Cocaine Cocaine.svg quite stimulating; quite euphoric; heavy cardiovascular side effects; very short duration; surprisingly entactogenic
3,4-Methylenedioxy-alpha-Pyrrolidinoisohexanophenone MDPHiP.svg quite stimulating; quite euphoric; quite entactogenic; heavy cardiovascular side effects; moderate duration insufflated
Metaphedrone 3-MMC.svg lighly entactogenic; quite stimulating; clean but short-acting euphoria; intensely addictive(made me feel as if this feeling would be the purpose of the rest of my life); high dosing requirements; memory disruption; corrosive
Orthophedrone 2-MMC.svg lighly entactogenic; increadibly stimulating; extreamly short-acting euphoria; intensely addictive; high dosing requirements, although more potent than expected; memory disruption
Mephedrone Mephedrone.svg cat-piss odor; lighly entactogenic; quite stimulating; medium dosing requirements

Stimulants

Compound Structure Notes
Lisdexamphetamine ❤ Lisdexamfetamine.svg favorite psychoactive substance for productivity; prodrug of my favorite stimulant
Dextroamphetamine Dextroamphetamine.svg quite stimulating; clean euphoria; minimal side effects
3,4-Methylenedioxy-alpha-Pyrrolidinoisohexanophenone MDPHiP.svg quite stimulating; quite euphoric; quite entactogenic; heavy cardiovascular side effects; moderate duration insufflated
Orthophedrone 2-MMC.svg lighly entactogenic; increadibly stimulating; extreamly short-acting euphoria; intensely addictive; high dosing requirements, although more potent than expected; memory disruption
Metaphedrone 3-MMC.svg lighly entactogenic; quite stimulating; clean but short-acting euphoria; intensely addictive(made me feel as if this feeling would be the purpose of the rest of my life); high dosing requirements; memory disruption; corrosive
4-Methylpentedrone 4-Methylpentedrone.svg lighly entactogenic; intense short acting euphoria; quite potent; quite tweaky
Dextromethamphetamine Dextromethamphetamine.svg quite stimulating; intense but short euphoria; long halflife; strong xerostomia(dry mouth)
Amphetamine Amphetamine.svg somewhat stimulating; clean euphoria; heavy cardiovascular side effects; very euphoric and practical via intravenous injection
Cocaine Cocaine.svg quite stimulating; quite euphoric; heavy cardiovascular side effects; very short duration; surprisingly entactogenic
N-Ethyl-Nor-Pentedrone N-ethyl-nor-pentedrone.svg intense short acting euphoria; quite tweaky
Ethylphenidate Ethylphenidate.svg mild stimulation; passed out on it on both occasions
Mitragynine Mitragynine.svg quite relaxing yet helpful for working; reduces minor pain; very helpful when crashing from dopaminergic stimulants; encourages sexuality
Caffeine Caffeine.svg light plesant stimulation; discomfort at higher doses; toxicity has nearly taken my life
3-Methylrolicyclidine 3-Methylrolicyclidine.svg relaxing yet mania inducing at 10mg
Salbutamol Salbutamol.svg respiratory enhancement; minimal to no stimulation; cardiovascular side effects
Modafinil Modafinil.svg effects not notable
Pseudoephedrine Pseudoephedrine.svg effective dosing not reached
Methylphenidate Methylphenidate.svg mininmal euphoria and stimulation; interesting when intravenously injected; causes anxiety and strong physical side effects
Mephedrone Mephedrone.svg cat-piss odor; lighly entactogenic; quite stimulating; medium dosing requirements
N-Ethyl-Nor-Heptedrone N-ethyl-nor-heptedrone.svg dull euphoria; extreme body heating
4-Methylbuphedrone 4-Methylbuphedrone.svg barely active; more sedating than stimulating
3-Fluoroethamphetamine 3-FEA.svg barely active even when intravenously administered
4-Fluromethamphetamine 4-FMA.svg barely active even when intravenously administered; softer curve
3-Fluromethcathinone 3-FMC.svg very short euphoria; heavy body heating; quite unpleasant
Bupropion Bupropion.svg paradoxical pharmacology; caused intense distress
Nicotine Nicotine.svg light stimulation; causes agitation and headaches

Psychedelics

Compound Structure Notes
Dimethyltryptamine ❤ DMT.svg ~15mg vaporized produced very light effects but made me leave with newfound meaning and motivation; ~20mg vaporized produced feelings of shooting through space while completely clear in my head, very clean beautiful visuals for 3 minutes; ~25mg vaporized produced feelings of being torn out of my body and lost in space for 3 minutes; ~30mg vaporized made my subconcious start talking "please help me, I want to leave this place(refering to my place in life)"
4-Bromo-2,5-dimethoxyphenethylamine 2C-B.svg caused a significant and a horrifying experience; reduces passing of time; overlaying yet intense visuals; interesting tactile sensations; "psychedelic phenethylamine go weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee ^w^"; "if this is a mind manifesting drug, than my mind is both love and a nighmare swarm of angry spinning rainbows"; intense 2.5 hour experience when intravenously injected

Opioids

Compound Structure Notes
Mitragynine Mitragynine.svg quite relaxing yet helpful for working; reduces minor pain; very helpful when crashing from dopaminergic stimulants; encourages sexuality
6-Monoacetylmorphine 6-MAM.svg obtained by letting Diacetylmorphine sit in a low pH solution for several weeks; quite potent; relaxing to the point of inducing sleep; warm; minor pain reduction; helps deal with siginificant emotional pain; weird dream like states which feel fully concious; encourages sexuality
Diacetylmorphine Diamorphine.svg prodrug to 6-Monoacetylmorphine; not very classy
Loperamide Loperamide.svg nothing to note
Oxycodone Oxycodone.svg strong apathy and sadness; feelings of body melting; when injected minor euphoria followed by nausea and intense sweating and warmth with only minor pain suppression

Sedatives

Compound Structure Notes
Bromazepam Bromazepam.svg relaxing; not very sedating
Lorazepam Lorazepam.svg relaxing; not very sedating; strong memory formation supression
Alprazolam Alprazolam.svg helps in distress; effective sleeping aid; cancels out stimulants if needed; quite potent
Diazepam Diazepam.svg helps in distress; effective sleeping aid; cancels out stimulants if needed
Temgicoluril Temgicoluril.svg helps in distress
Pregabalin Pregabalin.svg reduces some baseline anxiety; doesn't prevent breakthrough sensory overload
Zolpidem Zolpidem.svg effective sleeping aid; strange thoughts and dreams

Antipsychotics

Compound Structure Notes
Quetiapine ❤ Quetiapine.svg somewhat distressing / anxiety inducing to use; seams to relieve psychosis at proper dose in the matter of 3-7 hours; quite tranquilizing; unsure about effects on allergy
Amisulpride Amisulpride.svg messed me up at low dosage; kept me safe at a full dosage; quite pleasant probably due to opioid / GHB effects
Promethazine Promethazine.svg seamed too suggestive to treat acute distress; strongly delayed onset; potencially mild nausea reduction; unsure about effects on allergy
Aripiprazole Aripiprazole.svg way too long half-life; anxiety and discomfort; increased heart rate; teeth grinding

Antihistamine

Compound Structure Notes
Cetirizine Cetirizine.svg seamed too improve allergy symptoms
Bilastine Bilastine.svg seamed too improve allergy symptoms
Diphenhydramine Diphenhydramine.svg at 50mg pleasantly relaxing, reduced cognitive ability and agitation; seams too improve allergy symptoms
Mirtazapine Mirtazapine.svg creates unique bodily feeling; seams to suppress histamine effects; tranquailized me for 2 days straight
Promethazine Promethazine.svg seamed too suggestive to treat acute distress; strongly delayed onset; potencially mild nausea reduction; unsure about effects on allergy
Quetiapine Quetiapine.svg somewhat distressing to use; didn't seam to help that much directly but potencially over the hours after use; quite tranquilizing; unsure about effects on allergy

Antidepressants

Compound Structure Notes
Fluoxetine Fluoxetine.svg immediate improvement; comfortable feeling so far
Sertraline Sertraline.svg seams to improve well being after MDMA use; notable potenciation of lisdexamphetamine through CYP2D6 inhibition
Mirtazapine Mirtazapine.svg creates unique bodily feeling; seams to suppress histamine effects; tranquailized me for 2 days straight

Nootropics

Compound Structure Notes
Omberacetam Noopept.svg seams mildly stimulating

Amino acids

Compound Structure Notes
Oxitriptan 5-HTP.svg seams to improve wellbeing after MDMA use
Theanine L-Theanine.svg light but pleasant effects
Acetylcysteine N-Acetylcysteine.svg the taste of rotten eggs ruined my dextromethamphetamine tea
Pyridoxine Pyridoxine.svg uncertain activity
N-Acetyl-L-Tyrosine N-Acetyl-L-Tyrosine.svg uncertain activity; injected 500mg intravenous; corrosive

Antiemetics

Compound Structure Notes
Domperidone Domperidone.svg potencially mild nausea reduction
Promethazine Promethazine.svg seamed too suggestive to treat acute distress; strongly delayed onset; potencially mild nausea reduction; unsure about effects on allergy

Antihypertensives

Compound Structure Notes
Minoxidil Minoxidil.svg promotes hair regrowth; causes respiratory depression at 10-15mg oral administration

NSAIDs

Compound Structure Notes
Acetylsalicylic acid Acetylsalicylic acid.svg reliefs minor headaches; causes useful blood thinning for stroke prevention
Ibuprofen Ibuprofen.svg ineffective
Paracetamol Paracetamol.svg ineffective

Cannabinoids

Compound Structure Notes
Tetrahydrocannabinol THC.svg reduces cognitive functioning; slowed perception of time
Cannabidiol CBD.svg causes mental dulling; CYP2D6 inhibition unconfirmed

Dissociatives

Compound Structure Notes
Ketamine Ketamine.svg unnerving if injected rapidly; body distortion; perception in snap frames; amnesia; time distortion; followed by suicidal thoughts; interesting mind manifestation with positive reinforcement
Deschloroketamine DCK.svg similar to ketamine but slighly more rough
3-Methylrolicyclidine 3-Methylrolicyclidine.svg relaxing yet mania inducing at 10mg
Dextromethorphan DXM.svg effective dosing not reached; might have worsened previous psychosis

Alcohols

Compound Structure Notes
Ethanol Ethanol.svg reduces cognitive functioning; euphoric at nauseating doses; rather use this as a solvent
Isopropanol Isopropanol.svg accidental exposure; pretty euphoric and encouraging grandious thinking; causes headaches; ~24 hour duration; rather use this as a solvent
Phenol Phenol.svg potencial accidental exposure(blood in my urin); synthesized from salicylic acid for my suicide kit; likely very unpleasant(muscle spasms and cardiac arrest)
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