Experience:24 mg Alprazolam - Into the Void
- Date: September 2016
- Gender: Male
- Weight: 205lbs
- Age: 17
- Etc: Please don't redose.
Prior to this I had very little experience when it came to the realm of benzodiazepines. Previous experiences with benzos included Clonazepam (multiple experiences anywhere ranging anywhere from 1-3mg) and of course, Alprazolam.(in previous experiences, I had never dosed >4mg). When this experience happened I hadn't dabbled with benzos in a few months, so my tolerance was at base line. I deeply regret this experience and it is truly the only bad experience I have had with any substance in my life.
I strongly urge anyone taking Xanax to refrain from redoseing; you will not receive any more euphoria. You can only get so high before you fall into the void and end up doing something extremely stupid.
I came home after a nice day at school bored out of my mind with nothing to do and no plans, so naturally I decide it might be time to have a little fun. I looked around and discovered that most of my stash was drained so I decided to hit up the normal connections, everyone seemed to be dry but one of the connects happened to have 12 bars of Xanax he was trying to sell since he no longer needed them. These bars were 2mg each labeled "gg249", he was letting them go for extremely cheap so I decided to purchase all of them.
I came home later that night and decided to pop 2 bars and within about 15 minutes or so I started to feel extremely relaxed and frankly fucked up, in this state of mind I decided it would be a good idea to redose for a total of 6mg in my system, however as soon as I took the 3rd bar I decided to hide the rest of the bars in my wallet so I wouldn't redose. Next thing I remember is me attempting to get into bed to go to sleep and that is about all I remember.
Until it happens, all I remember are flashes of memories, me at school running into lockers, screaming at nurses, my blood being drawn(most vivid out of all of them), police being called to my home, trying to start fights, driving dangerously, me walking around a mental hospital, me screaming in a shower in a hospital, etc.
I then finally completely come to it and realize that I fucked up. I was in a psychiatric hospital, it turns out it had been about 4 or 5 days since I originally dosed my first bar, I was in complete awe, it was like I took a time travel machine and showed up here in this hospital.
To make things short I wound up staying there for a few weeks, the entire time I was there I thought I only took 6mg, but when I finally came home it turns out I actually took 24mg in total. I know this because the bag I hid in my wallet was empty, friends were telling me I was going crazy for about 2 days constantly redosing and taking bar after bar(Remember none of this I don't think). I thought I had taken 3 bars and went to bed, but it turns out I went insane and was on a Xanax binge.
This experience completely changed my mindset when it came to drugs, I respect substances a hell of a lot more than I used to now, if I had to give a piece of advice I would say stick to your doses.
- Compulsive redosing: "I was going crazy for about 2 days constantly redosing and taking bar after bar"
- Disinhibition: ", screaming at nurses; trying to start fights, driving dangerously"
- Amnesia: "(Remember none of this I don't think)"
- Physical autonomy: "me walking around a mental hospital; at school running into lockers"